Twomims

Alt title: SEVEN STEPS TO SLEEP TRAINING FOR WORKING MOMS

I don’t think there is a bigger struggle for a mom returning to work than SLEEP. You want it. You can’t have it. You are a baby-cereal-covered zombie dialing in for a conference call on your stapler, and it’s time for something to change.

You’ve heard about letting the baby ‘cry it out.’ I couldn’t do it. Here are the seven steps I followed, with great success.

1. Know why the baby wakes up

When a baby wakes in the middle of the night to nurse, he is most likely not searching for food but instead closeness and bonding. The baby sees the momma and wants that closeness, even if he isn’t hungry.

2. Break the habit in stages – Start on a Thursday

This process begins on a Thursday night because it will be a tough night, and it is important to have at least three consecutive nights to get a good start.

3. First, Dad puts the baby to bed

Mom leaves the house an hour before the baby goes to sleep. The baby gets the message from dad, ‘It’s just you and me, kid!’ This happens for a couple nights.

4. Second, No nursing from Mom

After the baby is asleep, dad is the only one to go in and see the baby when he awakes. He can hug, cuddle and even offer a bottle a few times. The only thing off limits is mom, until morning. Step 3 and 4 happen simultaneously.

5. Now, only one bottle in the middle of the night

So, you hopefully have had some success where the baby is decreasing night wakings, finding them unsuccessful (i.e. no mom).  We allowed one bottle for a couple nights, typically around 4 am.

6. Push back the night waking time, one hour at a time

Now you gotta get rid of the 4 am feeding. Here is where a little crying comes in but it is very ‘kind’ and doesn’t break your heart like true CRYING IT OUT.

Here’s how this stage works: For example, he wakes at 2 am, Dad goes in and pats him but doesn’t pick him up. He’ll probably get furious when dad  leaves the room. Dad waits 5 minutes, goes back in and pats him and leaves the room again. The KEY is every time it was the same thing: Dad comes in, pats three times, says “time for bed” and then walks out.
This way it doesn’t become a form of entertainment for the baby. It is predictable and boring. DO NOT PICK THE BABY UP! If the baby is standing in the crib, go ahead and lay the baby back down, pat three times and say “time for bed.”

This can continue for an hour… You can also increase the time from 5 minutes to 7 minutes between pats. At the end of an hour, that’s enough crying. Dad would usually feed the baby a bottle, pick the baby up and then rock a little bit then put back into bed.

7. Welcome to 6 am, MOM!

Now the baby is awake at 6 am. MOM feeds the baby to signal, “YES, this is the time that we can get up.” Then MOM has to stay awake with the baby. Resist the urge to just put the baby back to sleep. This is the training to the baby so they understand what you view as the correct waking hours. Yes, it’s early and tough, but it’s better than night wakings.

Aside: Honestly I got to the point where I enjoyed the bleary-eyed 6 am wake up call… before the rest of the world woke up, before I had to become my work self…. as a pure and simple time. It was just me and baby. Still dark outside with just a whisper of pink sunrise coming through the blinds, and only her gurgles to break the silence. We’d be sitting on the floor of her room – she’d be exploring board books while I watched her, thinking, Yep, kiddo, we’ll figure this thing out together.

Special thanks to Nancy Birkenmeier of the St. Luke’s Sleep Clinic, the sleep angel!

Tags: CIO, cry it out, moms in marketing, sleep, sleep tips, sleep training, tired, working mom, working moms